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Aloha Friday!
The school year is fast approaching and Luke will be going into first grade. Last fall I had a meltdown because I wasn’t managing two kids, working 40 plus hours a week and so on. So I went to my boss and worked a plan to cut my hours down to 32 hours a week. I was pleased that I could be a Marketing Professional and work for a company that allows me to work on a part time scale. Who could ask for anything better? Anyway I work 8-5 (Mon, Tues & Thurs) and 8-12 (Wed & Fri).
I have loved having these half days. The whole reason for the half days was so I could remove Luke from expensive daycare and I would pick him up from school on these days and grandmas got him on the other days. Now going into first grade we no longer technically need those half days.
SO MY QUESTIONS:
1. Do I keep my half days that I really do love?
2. Do I change my schedule again and work 8- 3:15 each day? This would allow more evening time for homework, etc.
3. Do I do what my husband really wants me to do and go back to working full time?
Warning: Do not pick # 3 or you will no longer be my friend, because I don’t like this option. LOL….
In all seriousness this is what my husband wants me to do. We have argued over this because I am managing my life so much better with working fewer hours. I do all the kid running, all the house cleaning and 90% of the cooking. It seems unfair that he expects me to carry this load and he is not OK with me working part time. I would also like to say money is not a factor here at all. Technically, money isn’t a factor for me working at all because I buy groceries, pay for child care and am about to make my last car payment.
18 Comments Welcome:
Go with your instincts on this. A mom's instincts are always right. If you want to gradually extend those days, start slowly and work up to it.
I agree that you should go with your instincts and do what is right for you.
If money isn't the issue I'd keep the schedule you love. Motherhood doesn't get many moments of pure bliss and it sounds like you've found an agreeable balance for yourself. Don't give that up.
I would say keep what is working for you...hello, if it's not broke don't fix it (at least that's what I have been told!)
Then you could get some of the stuff done without kids at home (cleaning, errends...) or do something fun for yourself (haircut, read a book...ect)
Have a great day!
Agree. Go with your instincts. If u can keep the short schedule--you know you can use it:) I don't know about just leaving at 3--you're practically done for day, anyway...Noon sounds like real time...but it depends on how good your care is the other days, I suppose?
Truly only you can answer this question. Go with what your heart tells you in right for you, and your family.
I have always given Heatherlyn the choice and would never expect her to work full time AND take care of everything else. It's ALOT of work to do what moms do and frankly I don't know how working moms do it. When all our kids are in school she said she wants to do something part time however make sure she's home when they return from school. It seems the longer they are in school, the more help they need.
So in answer to your question, I would say #2 or at least something that follows close to a school schedule. If it's not a matter of money then just keep your half days for #1. Sounds like a perfect schedule. (also sounds like you work for a great company)
Go w/ the schedule you love if money isn't the factor. Hubby wants me to work full time outside of the house but then the reality of having kids comes back & he repents mighty quickly!
Good luck getting your Hubby to understand. Maybe explain how much of the workload he'd need to pick up if you go back to work full time. It always makes mine do a hasty turn around.
How nice that your employer is flexible. That's hard to find. If it were me, I'd stick to the 1/2 days as long as possible. He shouldn't have too much homework yet.
Too bad hubbie isn't on board. It does seem unfair that mom's are expected to do all the house work whether they work or not (ok, not ALL men expect this, but many do...mine included).
If he pushes you on it, I'd say, "In order for that to be feasible we'll need to divide up some of the household chores." Then make a list (of everything) and take turns picking chores. That might help he see how much you really do.
I hope it works out the best way for everyone :D
If money isn't an issue, stay home whether the kids are in school or not. Guys don't understand WHAT exactly we do. They just don't get it. MAYBE if they had to spend 5 days (not 1, it's not enough) doing the mommy duties (and not slacking) they'd ALMOST understand.
Hold your ground sistah! lol
I'm going with #2 but if you are STILL responsible for housework, cooking, running errands etc. then you keep that part-time schedule. That is what helped your sanity. Go with it.
If #3 will make you that unhappy, you should not do it!!! Pick between #1 and #2 and do whichever one you like the most!
I think you need to weigh which of the options will work best for you. Will one of them work better than the others to allow you to do things you need to get done at work/around the house. Good luck making your decision.
I would stay with the half days if that makes you happy. If you're not happy, no one else will be either.
I wouldn't go back to working full time because your husband wants you too. Soon enough your children will be grown and these moments will be gone forever. You will have decades to work full time. Full time work is demanding and can sap a lot of energy that you would enjoy spending on your kids. I would only work full time if you absolutely HAD to or if you really wanted to. Otherwise, you might look back with some serious regrets or even resent your husband for doing something that caused you regrets. I doubt you will ever regret having more time and energy to spend with your kids while they are small.
I would just leave the schedule the same for another year because little kids don't have much homework and you are used to your current schedule.
But whatever you do, I hope it works out and brings you peace and happiness.
Would you be able to try out the second choice for a few weeks to see if you like it? Something that matches Luke's school schedule is probably the best for getting into a regular family routine, but then there's the advantage of half days for errand running I guess... it's hard to find what works for your situation.
Don't go back full-time, you've got lots of years to do that once your boys are bigger. They need you now. (Are we still friends ? ;)
I won't pick number 3 I promise!! Seriously, you said the words "I love" in number 1, so I say you stay with that! You can still get all of your running done and be sane at the same time. Stay with what is working for you now!!!
I say #1. I used to work M, W, F and loved it, then the divorce started so I went to full time but was blessed enough to be considered full time w/ benefits at only 4 day per week with Wednesdays off. Loved that too!!! Now my x has decided to quit his job just so that he won't have to pay me child support so I am in quite a pickle financially and have no choice but to work 40 hours to get every bit of money I can and I resent it so much!!This is my first week working all five days and I'm already miserable. I say when a mom is able to be part time she absoultely should. Kids grow up too fast to be away from them any more than necessary. Not to mention daycare is outrageous!!
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